In the fall of 2016, I took a leap. I was unhappy with my current job, I wanted more out of my leadership and I felt I needed to take my career trajectory into my own hands.
I stepped far outside of my comfort zone and decided to apply for a rigorous training position that required multiple rounds of audition and presenting and public speaking all for the opportunity to join a team for a year that proudly welcomed all our new employees into our company culture on their first day of work.
In the end, out of over 600 applicants, I was chosen for the team of 65 people, a position I would only hold for one calendar year.
On one of our first days of training, we were instructed to write letters to our future selves, outlining our current fears and insecurities and capture our feelings and hopes for the year ahead. After our year was over, we had a chance to read them again and reflect on how different our lives had become.
I’d like to share that letter with you now because I have spoken with so many women who felt the same way.
The me writing this right now is on her last day of training and I’m feeling nervous? Excited? I’ve got that feeling in the put of my stomach like someone is grabbing it from the inside and making a fist. I don’t know if I’m ready to be without all the support I’ve had the past few days.
This past year has been a Renaissance for you. You have everything you ever thought you wanted. A new house. A family. A job in social media, but through all that you haven’t felt enough. Something inside you has been looking for more. That’s why you’re here today. To find more.
I hope by the time you’re reading this, you can look back on your work and the lives you’ve touched and know you have been nothing more or different than yourself. I hope you are looking back at the me of right now and telling yourself you are enough. I hope you feel like you have inspired that next generation of employees with your humor and energy and they leave your class with full hears and high heads. And I hope at the end of the not-so-great days, you haven’t beat yourself up too badly.
I know right now as I’m writing that we are capable of great things, that our story hasn’t even begin. We are strong and sassy and kind, but we take no shit. And I’m certain you will show this side of us to every new person you meet.
Remember, it was 5 years ago you were new too. That magic is still inside of you somewhere. I hope you found it.
Look at all the things in your life. Look at Justin, Maisy, Parker, our beautiful new home. Look at all the people who are now a part of your life because of this job. That all started with you sitting on a couch at your university, taking a leap to apply for a job. It started with you wanting more.
It’s the same feeling you had when applying for this position. I hope it paid off.
You have the power to create happiness. I hope you got some back and found some more along the way.
Joining this team was, honestly, one of the best decisions I had made in my career. I met other people who were dealing with the same level of frustration that I was. People who loved their career but were feeling stifled by leadership and lack of development.
I drew strength from those peers of mine and made the decision to leave. One year after writing this letter, when I got to see it again, I was thriving in a new job, I felt valued and respected and I finally felt “more.”
I share this letter with you to let you know if you’re feeling this way, you are not alone. Even those people that you feel like completely have their shit together went through a position of doubt and unhappiness.
I share this letter to remind you that only YOU have the opportunity to make yourself feel more. That only YOU can take the steps to fill up the empty tanks in your soul and get yourself back to where you feel whole.
Hang in there, Sister. You are enough. You are capable of More.